


Where We Stand

by calderonfatima976



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Post Captain America Civil War, Rhodey is a protective little shit, Steve Needs a Hug, Tony Needs a Hug, sam is a good bro
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-14
Updated: 2016-11-14
Packaged: 2018-08-30 22:34:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8551810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calderonfatima976/pseuds/calderonfatima976
Summary: When the exAvengers reunite with the current ones, Steve thinks he can have another chance to admit his feelings to Tony.





	1. Chapter 1

Tony Stark. Retired Avenger. Where is he now? Taking care of the current Avengers and living in the Avengers Facility. Tony is relaxing at night, lying on the couch with a half empty bottle of whiskey. He may not be drunk but he clearly isn't 100% sober. He is aware of the fact that he can feel a buzzing in his pocket. All that Tony can tell from it is that it's the stupid phone Steve gave him.

_Steve_.

Something inside of Tony tells him to pick up the phone and he does so almost immediately. When he does, there is complete silence on the other side. Just when he almost hangs up, T'Challa is on the other line.

"Mr. Stark."

"Your highness."

"I have recently become aware that the Captain and his team are no longer fugitives."

"Yeah." A small pause from Tony. "Why the sudden call?"

"I will drop them off at the facility tomorrow morning." T'Challla ends with that and hangs up.

Tony shakes his head and tells Vision and Rhodes the news. With Vision in agreement, he leaves of for the rest of the night. Rhodey, however, stays to argue with Tony with the situation at hand.

"He'll try to hurt you again," Rhodey tells Tony.

"He won't," says Tony. "Not if I don't let him."

******

Steve Rogers. Where is he now? He's currently on his way back to the Avengers Facility after a bunch of crazy shit that's happened.

As of right now, Steve is currently on a jet being flown by T'Challa with the rest of the exAvengers or current criminals. The rest of the exAvengers look better than the Captain himself. They just do. Sam and Bucky had been talking and trying not to doze off. Wanda had been sleeping in her seat way more peacefully and comfortably than the jet ride had been making it for her. Clint and Scott were surprisingly able to stay awake considering they were the only ones not being dropped off into the Facility.

Steve hasn't been able to do anything since Siberia. He hasn't been able to sleep, drink, or eat as much as the next guy. He hasn't gotten around to shaving. Eating really is out of the question as it's pretty noticeable how skinny he had gotten. All of that because he wasn't honest with the one person he never wanted to lose.

Why did it end that way? Why didn't Steve tell Tony the truth? Why couldn't he confess his feelings since they've met? All of these questions flooded out of his mind once he felt they had landed.


	2. Chapter 2

The jet lands among the rooftop full of jets Tony made for the Avengers when he built the facility. However, you could easily tell T’Challa’s jet from former Stark private jets. When getting out of the jet, all of them were already exhausted from the early jet ride so maybe having to walk into the facility with their belongings was the last thing they wanted.

  
Besides Rhodey and Sam getting on the better of their last terms, Natasha having to share her room with Barnes, all that was left was Tony speaking with his royal highness.

  
“He hasn’t slept,” is the first thing T’Challa decides to say. “You do know that, don’t you?”

  
“There’s been a ton of shit he’s told me when I’ve drunk dialed him. Tony fires back without any remorse. “That could’ve been one of them, but then again, who really remembers?” He’s got a smug face for someone who doesn’t really like to wake up early. However, the smirk on his face almost immediately when he sees Steve.

  
_Oh my God, Steve._

  
Tony always saw the Captain high, mighty, and fully energized. But he would have never expected to see someone like Steve to look so low on energy like it’s been almost 3 months since he slept.

  
_3 months_.

  
*Flashback to about a month prior to current events*

  
“God, I hate you so much,” says Tony as he drunk dialed for what's probably the third time.

  
“I can't say I blame you,” Steve tells him. “But I do miss you so much.”

  
“Of course you do. Have you met me?”

  
“Yeah. I haven't slept ever since… you know.”

  
“Oh,” is all Tony can manage to say. He may be drunk but he is able to register some words. And does that hit him hard. “Do you get nightmares? About it?”

  
“Yeah. I have been getting this overwhelming feeling of guilt along with them. It's not your fault. I wasn't honest and I hurt you. I'm sorry.”

  
That. That right there was a Hulk smash to the fucking gut. Hey, maybe Tony should call Bruce over for a comparison test.

  
“I think I read that clearly in that garbage you call an apology letter. But don't let it get to you.”

  
“I think trying that has lead me to not sleeping. You deserve much more than how I've been to you. I'm so sorry, Tony.”

  
There it is again. Just hearing Steve apologize makes him feel terrible. Because he knows he means it and wants to hold him and hug him and--

  
“Ahem. I'll, uh, talk to you tomorrow. Bye Steve.”

  
“Goodnight, Tony. I love you.”

  
“Yeah you do.” As he hangs up, Tony is left thinking that those last words were meaningless. But then he remembers one thing about the Captain Rogers:

  
_He doesn't say anything without meaning_.

  
*Back to current times*

  
Tony shakes off the memory and feels like he's being carried. He looks at himself. And--

  
Oh is he surprised.

  
While being zoned out, Tony hadn't realized that Steve had ran to him, spun him and hugged him for a while. He had been whispering something that took Tony a while to figure out.

  
“I'm sorry.”

  
Steve was whispering and repeating those two words, biting back what felt like a cry. It had been so long since he had someone in his arms, someone to take care of. Someone like…

  
Steve feels Tony pushing back and pat him on the shoulder, telling him that it's okay and that everything is going to be alright. Steve almost cried once his grasp is free of the one man he wants to protect and hold and love.

  
That's when all his happiness goes downhill once he notices Rhodey staring at him. But it's not pleasant and it's not a stare like Steve has ever seen before. Rhodey has been angry before and in some cases where it's been controllable. But this was entirely different from anything Steve has seen before. Rhodey is the silent type of angry that no one can break through and it was the type that Tony would get when they needed to talk.

  
Little did Steve know, he and Rhodey were about to have the talk of his life. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longer chapters to come. Hope you enjoy.


	3. Chapter 3

"Rogers. Private. Now," Rhodey says to Steve as he sees him.

"Oh. Um, sure. I'll see you, Tony," Steve responds then waves and shies away from Tony.

"You think this is funny? A sick joke to think he can forgive you?"

"Why would you think that?"

Rhodey groans. "Don't try to fool me. I'm not gonna play your little help to trick Tony."

"Why do you think I'm trying to trick him?" Steve questions.

"He doesn't still forgive you. He also doesn't trust you yet." Rhodey is talking like he's running out of breath. "Tony told me about Siberia. You got yourself low. I don't know how he can stand to look at you."

"I don't know either. I just wanna be with him. Even if he doesn't want me near him. I want him to be happy. Even if that means I have to stay away from in order for that to happen. I know doesn't trust me yet nor does he forgive. I wouldn't either. I never thought things would get like this between us."

"Alright," Rhodey says quietly. "You've seem to have noticed your mistakes well enough. Maybe not enough to understand but you have pushed yourself. Seriously, when's the last time you ate or even slept?"

Steve just chuckles to himself silently.

"But," Rhodey goes on. "Know this. If you even try your worst to deceive him, play him, or even try to lie to him, that War Machine suit is coming after you."

Steve sighs. "Maybe I deserve it."

Rhodey replies, "Yeah, maybe you do."

  
After getting reunited with each other, everyone goes to their own room respectively… with a few exceptions. Well, at least two.

  
Sam was thankful to all gods that he didn't have to share a room. Natasha was willing enough to share a room with Tony’s considered ass hat (if you couldn't guess, it was Bucky). Wanda was aided by Vision with getting her things into her room and being settled. Then there was Steve, who ended up in a different sort of situation.

  
Ever since Siberia, Tony's been living at the facility taking care of the Avengers and what not. Ironically enough, he had also been sleeping in chambre du Captain while spending his time there. There had been something about Steve's room that made Tony feel safe, secure, and all things in between. Tony knew exactly that it would have meant much more and he probably wasn't going to like it. Just the thoughts alone almost made him throw up.

  
Steve walked into his to see that his bed was still undone. Everything had in check as he had remembered. Everything else however was left in check and completely organized from the last he could have remembered. Completely baffled in the current situation,

  
“Hey, um, about my room…” Steve is about to ask Tony.

  
“Oh.” Tony juts that out as if he was also confused. He didn't really want Steve to know the truth so he figured what could one small white lie do. “So, um… I, uh… so,” is all Tony can stammer out. So much for needing to use his head.

  
“Yeah?” Steve says as he continues to wait for a response. He's seemingly unminding of Tony’s inability to speak.

  
“Um,” and it's probably the last thing Tony is able to say to him. It's at this point that Tony is questions himself. _Why can't you just speak with him again? He won't hurt you unless you know it. Say something, you silent fuck._

  
“Everyone had their rooms locked while we all had been at the fight at Leipzig. Rhodey and Vision were the only ones able to unlock their own rooms. Without much reason, I would like to assume, FRIDAY decided to unlock your room. You can take the room back. No stress. I'll just bunk on the living room couch.”

  
“No,” Steve blurts out. “I mean I haven't been able to sleep for sometime and you seem perfectly well rested from sleeping in here. I don't mind crashing on the couch.” This becomes a direct hit t _o the gut._ Tony starts to think, _He… cares about me being well rested? No, don't fall for it. He's trying to play you._

  
“Oh, um… I, uh,” Tony stammers for the umpteenth time. All he can fucking do is stammer. Well, that's what happens when he sees the man that _almost killed him_. But even before those events, Tony had never seen Steve so easily giving. He wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel, but something inside him told him it clearly wasn't good. For someone known for having a smart mouth, Tony was surely being quiet now.

  
“So, do you need help with anything?” Tony asks Steve. “Like, is there anything you need to get off your mind?”

  
“No, no, no,” Steve utters out. “I just um… I uh… it's just that…”

  
“Use your words, Cap,” Tony's mouth decided to blurt out. He covered his mouth right after saying it but was clearly blown away with how Steve didn't react to what he said at all. And if Steve didn't grimace at any snarky thing Tony would say, it was then Tony knew that the world would have to be ending.

  
“I'm just grateful that you're doing all this. Even after all that's happened. I don't really deserve it and I just hope you know that.

  
_Don't do this to yourself, Stark. He's trying to fuck with you._ Tony’s thoughts are making his brain ramble at this point. _He's just trying to reel you in to throw you back out. But, honestly, he just looks so tired. Like, it's as if he genuinely hasn't slept for ages. Unless he… what if…_

  
“Tony, are you okay? You seemed quiet. Oh no, did I say something wrong? If I did, I'm really sorry. I really didn't mean to say it. I'm sorry I hurt you in anyway. Or if there's something you wanted me to say, I'm sorry for not saying it. I just, uh, I don't want to, um…”

  
“Hey, cap. Relax, okay? I'm alright. We're on the same side. You don't need to worry. Just some thoughts going on in my head. Really though, you did nothing wrong.” Tony has honestly never seen Steve give in so easily. Or better yet, he's never seen him like this at all. Nervous, out of breath, tired, you name it.

  
“Oh, um, okay” Steve shies away from him and sits on the bed. He just sits there and stretches and yawns. He slouches forward, extending the look of exhaustion. It's as if he's about to fall asleep right then and there.

  
Once he almost falls off the bed, Tony jumps in to catch him. “Whoa there soldier. You feeling okay?” Tony now has one hand on the captain’s neck and one on his shoulder.

  
“Hm? No, yeah I'm fine. I just… need to…” And it's from that unfinished sentence Steve falls asleep on Tony’s chest.

  
_Well, now I'm starting to see it._ Because of what he thinks is due to tension and impulse, Tony starts to stroke the hair on the back of Steve’s neck. _I leave him alone, he won't fall asleep. It's clear that he has t been able to for the last three months._

  
“So, uh, cap? I've got some lab work that needs to get done. Do you think you can just lay down here for a small nap of your own?” Tony starting to become flustered with all this tension and doesn't know how to feel or what to think at this point.

  
“Mmhm.” He hears it come out of Steve’s mouth but not much else. Sure, he also feels him shift in his spot but there isn't much else.

  
Tony slowly lays Steve down on his back very slowly, making sure he doesn't wake up. Tony slowly steps back to go to his lab and get some work down, but was clearly not fast enough for Steve to sit up and catch him by the hand.

  
“Please stay. I won't sleep by myself. Not without you,” Steve whispers out to him. Tony feels another hit to the gut. He really needs to call Bruce in for a comparison. “Uh, sure, I-I guess.”

  
Tony slides into the bed next to Steve and lies down next to him. Steve shifts closer to him and Tony reaches the capability to feel his warmth.  _Maybe the lab work can wait. If he is willing to grab my hand and stop me from getting something done, then I guess he really needs me._

  
Tony falls asleep without realizing it. He doesn't know how but he does and it makes him happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all, I am so sorry. School was doing me a shit job with a ton of stuff and I honestly thought I would be brain dead. But it ain't about me, so I put a lot of work just for y'all to enjoy. Hope you do. Peace love sweet dreams


	4. Chapter 4

Steve yawns as he wakes up. He shifts on the bed and realizes the still lying form next to him, sleeping. And even though it's dark, Steve is able to make out Tony's face.  

 

_ He seems so peaceful,  _ Steve thinks as he strokes away the stray hairs on Tony's face.  _ Maybe there is some trust left in him.  _

 

Steve sees and feels Tony wake up. His eyes flutter slowly as he opens them and sees Steve smiling calmly at him. And although Steve seems happy, Tony sort of doesn't feel mutual. It could be probably because he doesn't remember anything that happened before falling asleep. 

 

“Um, what the fuck happened?” Tony asks scared but only gets a little relieved seeing as neither of them are nude. Those words havethe smile off of Steve's face in a second.

 

“You… don't remember anything?” Steve sadly responds. 

 

“All I  _ can  _ remember is me falling asleep.” Tony is starting to raise his voice. “Did you manipulate me or something?”

 

“What?” Steve responds confused and almost whisper like. He can't think of any other way to react. 

 

“Are you trying to fuck with me? Did you just want to trick me into forgiving you?” Tony is starting to shout and it's scaring the living hell out of Steve. 

 

“No, no, no. I was just–”

 

“Look Rogers. Don't just try to take advantage of this situation. You can't just apologise and make me forgive you. That's not how shit works in the real world. Just fuck off, alright? I'm going to my lab to get work done. Don't waste your breath trying to bother me.”

 

“But I—” 

 

“Don't.”

 

Steve stays in the room by himself in the room. He wants to chase after Tony and tell him his feelings. He wants to hold him. He wants to cry. He  _ needs  _ to cry. And yet, Steve doesn't. 

 

While in his lab, Tony starts to make adjustments and upgrades to his latest suit.

 

_ Trying to manipulate me. Thinks he can do whatever he wants and get away with it.  _ Tony thinks considering he's still mad at him.  _ Well, maybe I should've given him a chance to explain,  _ he thinks out of sorrow.  _ No, don't let him get to you.  _ He reverts to anger.  _ He wants you to feel guilty just to laugh in your face again.  _

 

“Boss,” FRIDAY's voice pulls Tony out of his thoughts. “There's someone at the door for. They've come with food and what seems to be coffee.” 

 

“FRI, you had me at coffee. Let them in,” Tony tells her. He slides the goggles from his eyes to his head and rubs his eyes immediately from exhaustion.  Of course to Tony a coffee break was never a bad thing. 

 

“I bought some doughnuts and made the coffee in the kitchen. I don't really mean any trouble by this,” Steve's voice echoes throughout the lab. It causes Tony to freeze but then for him to move his hands slowly away from his eyes.

 

“I'm sorry. About earlier.” Steve has sorrow in his voice now. “I was just tired and you were there—”

 

“Look, it's water under the bridge,” Tony cuts him off. “You can just leave the stuff off and head out.” Tony really just snarks at him. 

 

“But I—”

 

“Nothing. I don't want to mistakenly trust you again whatsoever. Not after what's happened. Thanks for your thoughtfulness, but I really don't need any of your fucking pity.”

 

“Oh. Okay,” Steve just leaves the food on the nightstand next took Tony's working table. As soon as he leaves the lab, he hears the door automatically lock. There's never been anything that's matter Steve feel so broken.

 

Tony watches the door closed but goes straight to eating soon afterwards. After indulging in the doughnuts and coffee, Tony returns back to his suit. He groans at another failed attempt at processing a new upgrade. 

 

“You know, he isn't trying to hurt you,” Bucky tells Tony and it scares the living shit out of Tony. 

 

“Ugh Barnes, what in fuck's name could you possibly want?” Tony says, already annoyed by him. “How did you even get in here?”

 

“Snuck in when you were scowling at Steve, but not my point of reason. Do you even know his health status?”

 

“I don't know.” Tony just shrugs, “I'm guessing he's hungry and he could use some sleep being the most obvious. Like seriously, how long has it been: three months?”

 

Bucky just scoffs, “Understatement of the year.”

 

Tony turns to him ever so slowly. “What do you mean understatement? That's what T'Challa told me.”

 

“And what did Steve tell you?” Bucky asks condescendingly.

 

“Since Siberia…” Tony's words fade out as realizes everything and puts it all together. 

 

“Yeah. And if anyone can keep track of time, then I think you would know that Siberia happened seven months ago.”

 

“You're bluffing,” Tony scoffs and Bucky just shrugs at him. 

 

“Hey, I thought the same thing when I got outta being cryofrozen. But seeing him after being told, it turns out it wasn't that hard to believe.”

 

“Look Barnes,” Tony sounds annoyed at this point, “I don't give two shits if he's attempted to sleep and failed because of me. He should've thought about that when he almost killed me. That's enough of your guilt trip, alright? Get the fuck out or I'm using the suit.”

 

“Alright, alright, I'm going. But just one thing,” Tony groans but Bucky goes on, “he's not blaming you for it, he's blaming himself.”

 

“Yeah, okay,” Tony scoffs as Bucky leaves. “Oh for fuck's sake,” he yells at another failed attempt at an upgrade. “Alright, break time. Lemme go bother Rhodey.”

 

Tony leaves the lab and is startled by a sketching Rogers next to the door and sitting on the floor. “Jesus, Cap, you scared me. How long have you been there?”

 

Steve looks up at Tony's face and stands up.  “Oh, um,” Steve stammers out again. “Well, I had my sketchbook with me when I , uh, brought you the food and coffee. I thought I would be able to keep you company while you were working. You didn't want me in there with you, though. So, I just waited out here for you, I guess.”

 

“Why the fuck did you wait exactly?” The tone of Tony's voice made it sound like his annoyance never left him. 

 

“To, uh, apologize about what happened earlier. Even if you don't remember. I'm sorry if I made you stay when you didn't want to.”

 

Tony hears the sorrow in Steve's voice and remembers everything that had happened. 

 

_ Please stay. I won't sleep by myself. Not without you.  _

 

However, it somehow all passes Tony's mind when gets a peek at Steve's open sketchbook. He notices a familiar figure but it's still a little hard to makes out. 

 

“Whatcha got there?” Tony asks Steve suspiciously. 

 

Steve looks at his book and widens his eyes as if he just realizes what he's drawn on it. “Oh, um, it's nothing really,” he says hiding the sketchbook behind his back. 

 

“How about I check it out then?”

 

“No, really. It's not a big deal.”

 

“Rogers. The book. Now.”

 

“Tony, please.”

 

“Alright, that's it. I'm going after it.”

 

“Wha–?” Steve gets cut off once Tony tackles him into the ground. He manages to grab the book from Steve's hand. 

 

“Didn't think you wouldn't have _ not _ resisted…” Tony fades his words out once he gets distracted by the fact that his face is only inches apart from Steve's. 

 

Steve is looking into Tony's eyes and he's noticing how really nice they are. Tony's eyes scroll down the Captain's face to his lips. From there, he notices how much of the same oxygen they're sharing. 

 

“Tony…” Steve whispers and it seemed chills down Tony's spine. It makes him want to lean in and just…

 

“Ahem,” Tony hears from Natasha clearing her voice. She appears in his vision with Sam and Rhodey. 

 

Tony scramble off from on top of Steve and helps him up. “I guess you can show the sketches later, huh?”

 

Tony hands Steve the sketchbook and Steve hesitates to take it back. “Oh, um, sure I guess.”

 

“Hey, Steve, Sam says, causing Steve to break the eye contact between him and Tony, “how about we talk for a little bit?”

 

“Oh, um, sure. See you later, Tony,” Steve says as he's dragged into the next room by Sam. 

 

“Is there anything you want to explain between you and Stark?” Sam asks as he closed the door. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna be superbly honest. I left this off on their conversation BC I honestly knew you guys were anticipating for a new chapter and what with school and home, I've been really tired. Stay beautiful. New chapter soon.

**Author's Note:**

> A. First fic. Inexperienced  
> B. Hope you enjoyed


End file.
